Jennifer and I attended the Wayne County Extension Homemakers Achievement Program a couple weeks ago. I'm looking into joining a club, but there are not too many clubs in Marion county.
In past years the Extension homemaker's Creed has stuck in my mind as it has this year:
We believe in the present and its opportunities, in the future and its promises, in everything that makes life large and lovely, in the divine joy of living and helping others.
And so we endeavor to pass on to others that which has benefited us, striving to go onward and upward, reaching the pinnacle of economic perfection in improving, enlarging and endearing the greatest institution in the world: THE HOME. (By Mrs. C.W. Horne, Hendricks County, Indiana)
These words ring true in what my mom was and what this group is that she was part of. I strive to be like her in the ways of being a mom and a homemaker.
Sunday, May 17, 2009
Monday, May 11, 2009
grief
Grief is a curious thing. I think I'm doing really well, then, bam, it shows up unexpectedly and unwanted. I think unwanted; though it makes me focus on mom, and memories of her are a blessing.
We celebrated with Nancy Friday night along with Blake's siblings and their spouses. Near the end of the evening, Kelsey was talking about how nice it would be to have someone feed you (as she was feeding nearly 9-month old Gryphon). My thoughts drifted to a few weeks before mom's death. She wasn't able to really feed herself, and she didn't have much appetite. After suggesting many food options, she said pineapple sounded good. WONDERFUL! I rushed to her kitchen got some crushed pineapple and brought it to her. I had gotten fairly profiecient at feeding another; Jack was 11 months old at the time. I took the spoon and fed mom tiny bites of pineapple. She only took a bite, maybe two. She wasn't able to really chew or swallow. How strange it was to have to feed my mother. How glad I was to be able to be there with her, to care for her.
As Mother's Day approached, it's only natural for my thoughts to drift in her direction. I asked Dad if anyone had visited the cemetary yesterday. No one had. I normally don't feel a 'connection' when I visit the cemetary and don't go real often. However, as it was a day to honor our mothers, it somehow felt strange that no one had been there ON Mother's Day. As Meg Ryan talks about missing her character's mother in You've Got Mail, my thoughts are similar: I miss my mom so much I can barely breathe. I know too that not every moment is so overpowering with this missing, this grief. I love her so much and want to share so much with her and just so much want to be able to tell her, Happy Mother's Day, Mom.
We celebrated with Nancy Friday night along with Blake's siblings and their spouses. Near the end of the evening, Kelsey was talking about how nice it would be to have someone feed you (as she was feeding nearly 9-month old Gryphon). My thoughts drifted to a few weeks before mom's death. She wasn't able to really feed herself, and she didn't have much appetite. After suggesting many food options, she said pineapple sounded good. WONDERFUL! I rushed to her kitchen got some crushed pineapple and brought it to her. I had gotten fairly profiecient at feeding another; Jack was 11 months old at the time. I took the spoon and fed mom tiny bites of pineapple. She only took a bite, maybe two. She wasn't able to really chew or swallow. How strange it was to have to feed my mother. How glad I was to be able to be there with her, to care for her.
As Mother's Day approached, it's only natural for my thoughts to drift in her direction. I asked Dad if anyone had visited the cemetary yesterday. No one had. I normally don't feel a 'connection' when I visit the cemetary and don't go real often. However, as it was a day to honor our mothers, it somehow felt strange that no one had been there ON Mother's Day. As Meg Ryan talks about missing her character's mother in You've Got Mail, my thoughts are similar: I miss my mom so much I can barely breathe. I know too that not every moment is so overpowering with this missing, this grief. I love her so much and want to share so much with her and just so much want to be able to tell her, Happy Mother's Day, Mom.
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